COMING NEXT WEEK: 10 things you can start doing to become successful.
Life is all about perspective. History is replete with people who have overcome seemingly impossible challenges, dug themselves out of horrible circumstances and created opportunities where absolutely nothing existed. There are common threads for all of these success stories, and often you’ll find that these people think differently, act differently and believe differently.
Often, it’s not just the principles, guidelines and rules. It’s more about beliefs, values, determination and persistence. Want to get to the next level? Want to know what millionaires do that you don’t? Here are some suggestions to help you start turning the big boat around. This list is about changing your mindset and perspective. Don’t try to bite off every one of these ideas. Pick one or two, and start there. Remember, it’s a process, but there’s always the first step.
STOP WITH THE EXCUSES.
It’s time to get brave. Stop blaming other people and circumstances. Own your mistakes, your hesitations, your beliefs and your choices. Make your own decisions and stick to them. If they don’t work, move on. Failure is inevitable — you’ll find that failure after failure litters the road to success. If you want a pity party, put a time limit on it. Then, get up, dust yourself off and move on. You will find your future straight ahead, not in the rearview mirror. Question: What excuse have you fallen back on?
STOP KNOCKING AND START BANGING.
Now hear me out. Sometimes we try to tip toe onto the next level. Yogi Berra says, “Nice guys finish last,” While we don’t have to be ugly or unprofessional, we must develop that never-give-up bulldog tenacity. Persistence is okay. If the first answer is no, ask again, or ask somewhere else. Then, again. If the door doesn’t open the first time, check your heart, but keep knocking, and the door will open. Be careful when you knock: Doors will open. You don’t have to run over people, but you should keep pushing and fighting. Question: What situation have you tip-toed around? How can you be more persistent?
STOP BEATING YOURSELF UP.
Okay, so you failed, or it didn’t work as you wanted. Stop kicking yourself. Vince Lombardi says, “It’s not whether you got knocked down; it’s whether you get back up.” Unstick yourself. Look forward, determine your next step and take it. Stop telling yourself what you did wrong and start telling yourself what can go right. Successful people fail all the time. They refuse to accept it. It’s not their fault, and it’s not your fault unless you quit. Question: How can you focus more on the how than the why?
STOP LOOKING FOR THE MAGIC WAND.
Look, get-rich-quick schemes and shortcuts have been around since the beginning of time. They may work for a season — or appear to work a short season — but they peter out quickly. It’s the story of the hare and the rabbit. Beverly Sills said, “There are no shortcuts to any place worth going.” Put in an honest day’s work, and you’ll get an honest return. But you’re wasting time if you think you can short circuit the system. Question: Who can I ask to review my project or challenge that will give me good advice?
STOP HANGING OUT WITH THE WRONG CROWD.
This one can be tough, but it’s one thing that will make a huge difference. You have friends — and even family — you’ve been hanging around for a long time. But they’re holding you back and dragging you down. At the very least, stop subjecting yourself to the toxic crowd. That crowd is deflating, discouraging and defeating. Here’s a great Q&A about Your Fab 5 — you can take our course too. Question: What do I need to change about my inner circle?
STOP FOCUSING ON WHAT YOU DON’T HAVE.
It’s all about perspective. The winners in life don’t fret about not having enough money, time, resources, and people, and they don’t wait for the right circumstances. Take your eyes off what you don’t have and start looking for what you have that will propel you into your future. Question: What do I have (make a list), and how can I implement that today?
STOP TRYING TO CHANGE WHAT YOU CAN’T CONTROL.
You cannot control a lot, and if you aren’t careful, you’ll psych yourself out. Start here: Write down what you can control. You will find many things, starting with your attitude and perspective. You can not control what others will say or do. You can’t always control circumstances, so focus on what you can control. You can control a few things: Attitude, mindset, motivation, effort, work ethic, focus, responses to situations and others, and your words and actions. Start there. Focus there. Action item: Make a list of what you can control. Focus there.
STOP DISTRACTIONS IN THEIR TRACKS.
Time is short, and you don’t have time for distractions. Set your boundaries and keep them firm. It’s okay to tell someone ‘no’ or at least ‘not now’. Remember, it’s your schedule. It’s your time. And, it’s your choice. You don’t have to answer the phone. You don’t have to respond to emails right now. You don’t have to check Facebook 20 times a day. Don’t complain about what you allow. The cousin to distraction is multi-tasking. There is no such thing. You’re great, but your mind can focus on only one thing at a time. Don’t try to force the issue. Finish one thing, then move on to the next thing. Question: How can I set boundaries for my schedule and my day?
STOP COMPARING YOURSELF TO EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE AROUND YOU.
You have only one person to beat: Yourself. You can be your own worst enemy, so stop adding others to the comparison list. You’ll never measure up if you’re always looking around to measure yourself by others. Run your race, stay in your lane, and write your own story. The Bible says, “When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they lack wisdom and behave like fools.” 2 Corinthians 10:12 (Amplified). Why try to keep up with the Joneses? They’re broke anyway. Question: What would I do if money, people’s opinions, time, resources and other influences were not an issue? Go do that.
STOP LIVING IN FEAR.
Everything you want is on the other side of fear. Today is a good day to go through. Winston Churchill said, “If you’re going through hell, keep going.” Do it scared. Tackle the hard things first. My pastor once told me: “Most people run from things that aren’t chasing them.” Fear is the greatest thief of your success. If you do it scared and press through, you will be in the minority. Tony Robbins identifies some types of fear and how to overcome it. Question: What would change in my life if I just pushed through my biggest fear?
STOP GETTING READY.
Done is better than perfect. If you wait for everything or everyone to be in place or at the ideal time, you’ll be waiting until Jesus comes. Just do it and get it done. What are you putting off? Pull the trigger. Question: What can I do right now to start?
STOP SAYING YES TO ANYTHING THAT DOESN’T MOVE YOU TOWARD YOUR GOAL.
Come on, now, you need boundaries — even for the good things! Yes, doing good things can keep you from becoming great. Don’t shout me down when I’m preaching good. Think of it this way: If you say “yes” to something, what are you saying “no” to? Or, if you say “yes” to someone, what are you saying “no” to for yourself? Decide to say “no” to the good thing today so you can say “yes” to the great thing. Question: What good things do I need to stop doing so I can say yes to the great things?
STOP GIVING UP.
It’s not over until it’s over. And the only time it’s over is when you give up for the last time. Babe Ruth said, “You can’t beat the person who never gives up.” That’s so true. You may be three feet from gold, so add persistence and perseverance to your tool belt and go one more block, take one more step, and make one more call. Question: What have I failed at most? Can I give it one more try?
You can do this. You were made for this moment. What do you need to stop doing today to be successful? Pick one or two and start there. Next week, we’ll be back with 10 things you can start doing to become successful.