This is not a political post. Please don’t make it out to be one.
One of today’s challenges in relationships, politics, or business is that we conflate arguments or debates. It’s easy to chase rabbits or overlap conversations based on agenda, beliefs or preferences. Often, this inflated conflation deflates an honest discussion about a matter.
For example, America has had discussions for decades about immigration, but rather than focus on one specific issue, the sides debate their preferences. Gun control is another area that is a constant conflated debate. It also happens in our personal lives when we say things to each other. People “hear” one thing when you say it and then add their preference to the matter, and ever so suddenly, an argument ensues.
This brings me to today’s post.
I’m longing for the good ol’ days. And it’s okay to long for good things. Yes, 50 years ago, life was not good for everyone. I understand that, and there are some things we should never go back to or bring forward. There were different beliefs, tendencies, accepted traditions and mores that should have been addressed long ago.
Likewise, some values were inherent for decades, if not centuries, that would benefit us today, and we shouldn’t throw it all out just because we were wrong about some things. Remember the days when you could drink from a water hose, play stickball in the front yard with neighbors and enjoy family?
Here are some elements of the good ol’ days that would benefit 2022.
Work ethic. Where did that go anyway? The Bureau of Labor and Statistics said 4.3 million employees quit their jobs in January. Sure, some started a new business, and others retired, but the studies show many people still don’t want to work. Anecdotally, virtually every restaurant we have been to in the last year is short-staffed. They tell us they can’t get people to work.
Years ago, employees were more engaged and more appreciated. Today, many employers feel they have an “engaged” employee if they show up to work on time. People don’t want to work anymore. They want to play, or so it seems. I long for the good ol’ days when people went to work, enjoyed what they did and lived happily ever after.
Dinner table. Remember when mom, dad, and the kids gathered around the table for dinner? That was a requirement at my house growing up. If you wanted to live there, you came to dinner. And you stayed until dinner was over. The dinner table was where conversations happened — it’s where life happened. Our kids are grown now, so we don’t do that as often, but the world is a better place when the family sits around the dinner table.
Respect. Respect for one another is a little-known trait in today’s times. It may be non-existent altogether. You need not look further than political circles, the Hollywood elite or professional sports. The weapons have gone from policy differences to personal demagoguery. We live in a “look-at-me” self-centered victim world where we are taught life is about us rather than others. Give me a throwback to a time when men and women could have a conversation around a game of cards or food, and love or like others even though they may disagree with their lifestyle or opinions.
Service. I’m old enough to remember when the gas station attendant came out to fill up your car, clean your windshield, and check your tire pressure and under the hood. I understand that ain’t happening today, but people have little tolerance and less patience — customers and servers. Recently, we were making a purchase at a large store. There were two cashiers. One was upbeat, happy, engaging and interactive. That was ours, and we were both having a good time, joking and exchanging comments during the transaction. The other cashier was looking over at us with eyebrows raised, almost with disdain. We felt treated well, supported and happy, even though the bad news was that all of our items weren’t there, and we would have to come back another time to pick them up. That customer service is rare today. It should not be.
The news and television in general. Don’t get me started. I was in radio for nearly 30 years, so I got to see some of this up close and personal. Some of you will remember when there were only three TV networks. Walter Cronkite, Edward R. Murrow, Huntley & Brinkley, Frank Reynolds and Harry Reasoner wouldn’t even recognize TV news today. News today is non-existent — today’s “news” programs are advocacy-based and opinion-driven, where personal attacks are the way of the day. Television and movies, too, have evolved — not all for good.
To be sure, technology and the internet is at the center of many of the less-personal/more-personal changes. You can talk “at” someone without having to talk “to” someone. You don’t have to see their face, get to know them or understand their circumstances or situations. You don’t have to care, help or even acknowledge someone’s plight. It’s easy — all too easy — to ship off a text or email and go on about your way.
To be sure, I’m not advocating going back to the good ol’ days. Rather, let’s choose some things to bring forward. Everyone has something from the good ol’ days that should be left in the good ol’ days. In the same way, everyone has something from the good ol’ days that they can and should bring forward. Don’t throw out the baby with the bath water.
I miss the good ol’ days.